Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Reptile Vs. Scorpio

I'm a homebody.  No, really I am.  And you should never underestimate my preference for staying home because I've been known to surprise people at how much I can stand being home for extended periods of time.  Besides, who needs to go out when I can have my own adventures indoors?

Just late last week, my son and I were overjoyed seeing these two, first in our neighbor's backyard and then eventually they moved to ours...

They just suddenly came out from the wooded area and we felt so sorry for them because they seemed really lost.  It was fun staring at them and watching them as they tried to freeze for us.  I guess they could see and sense us even from behind our windows so after a while, Noah was enjoying playing semi-hide-and-seek with these two beauties. Eventually, the game ended and they found their way back to the woods, so there goes their happy ending!  Yipee!

This morning though, someone surprised me again, although in a not-so-good way.  I have to warn you that I also contributed to its not-so-good 'ending'....

blue-tailed lizard

I'd like to think of all this as 'meant to be'.  You see, I was on my computer with my back turned away from the window.  And then Noah came to talk to me, so I spun around to face him.  Then it just so happened that my eye wandered towards the window (curtains drawn, by the way) and lo and behold. I saw this 'shadow' crawling on the backside of the white curtain.  Noah was in denial at first, insisting that the shadow was just coming from outside.  I knew better and ran as fast as I could to grab one of those sticky traps given by our pest control guy, who just happened to have been here YESTERDAY!

Thank goodness this lizard was pretty slow that by the time I got back, it was still there.  With one swift flick of the wrist, I was able to trap it as if I was just taking off some lint with a strip of masking tape.  I don't mean to offend anyone reading this, especially animal rights advocates and reptile lovers. However, it is what it is.  I am freaked out by anything that crawls (babies included, although that's a different kind of freak out).  And I should also admit that I'm also surprised by my own reaction considering I grew up in the Philippines where lizards are part of everyday home life.  You see them on walls and you hear them 'clicking' away and just pray they stay away from you.  Getting used to them doesn't mean liking them though.  (You can get used to an annoying co-worker but by no means will you turn buddies and start hanging out!)  I guess we just resign ourselves to certain realities and learn to move on.  

But I'm not quite resigned yet to the idea that blue-tailed lizards, other reptiles, pests and insects can just decide to enter my home and scare the heck out of me whenever they feel like it.  Again, it is what it is and I am who I am.  I am an extremely territorial human being (you have no idea) and I am prepared to wear sticky tape 24/7 if need be!

Friday, July 19, 2013

Why You Shouldn't Play Candy Crush

You know those DirectTV commercials that feature causality at its best?  Well, I've decided to make my own version concerning the highly addictive online game, Candy Crush Saga.


When you play Candy Crush, you get stuck.

When you get stuck, you scream and growl in front of your computer.

When you scream and growl in front of your computer, others start thinking you're possessed.

When people think you're possessed, they call an exorcist.

When an exorcist comes, you get tied to a bed for hours.

When you get tied to a bed for hours, sooner or later you'll have no other choice but to end up peeing and sh*tting in your pants.

When you pee and sh*t in your pants, you'll be put back in diapers.

Don't get put back in diapers. 

Get rid of Candy Crush.  
Either that or learn meditation to manage game-related anxieties.


Friday, July 12, 2013

Shutting Out the Shut-Eye

All of us have moments in our days when we are not our smartest.  Okay, maybe even really stupid and irrational.  For me, this happens mostly between 2 and 3 in the afternoon.  As to why I continue on this lost battle despite the fact that this is also the time of day when I feel most brain-dead and crabby, I do not know.  

I'm talking about that time of day when it's nap time.  It's that time of day when, while trying to hold my son captive for at least an hour, I end up as the one held in captivity as I pretend to nap myself just so he would slow down, lie down with me and close his eyes.  98% of the time, it's seriously a battle.  I push and my six year old pushes back. I want him to rest.  He wants more play time.  I argue that his body (and his eyes, given that he's on the computer or tv a lot) need to rest.  He reasons that summer break will be over and soon he won't have time to enjoy play time.  I counter with 'No honey, you still have a number of weeks'.  He desperately responds with 'But I hate how I close my eyes and then when I wake up it's almost night time and I lose TOO MUCH playtime!'.    

Kids + Car rides = Guaranteed Zzzz's (Don't ask me why.)

I don't really want to employ fear tactics for fear that it might backfire.  (And it always does, doesn't it?).  But I always get so tempted to utter, "Oh, enjoy it while it lasts."  What these children don't realize is that taking naps is truly a luxury.  We start out in life having them as a necessity, and I'm sure most of us have memories of feeling forced by our parents to take naps.  But our parents knew we needed them.  And they needed a break from us too, I'm sure.  One of my fondest childhood memories is that of Saturday afternoons at home.  My Mom was a working mother so weekends with her were precious to me.  What's more, I loved seeing her make and bake sweet stuff for me and my siblings as that was just impossible for her to do during the work week.  She would bribe us with brownies as the reward if we promised to take our naps.  And I remember feeling so excited about the brownie at the end of my nap and smelling the sweet chocolate cooking in the oven while I pretended to be in dreamland.  The best part was 'waking up' and finding out that Mom had saved the bowl for me to lick some of the leftover brownie mix.  (And I wonder why I was never a skinny kid?)

So yes, I have good memories of napping.  And the older I got, the better my naps became.  The only problem is, by that time, it was no longer acceptable or encouraged to take naps, and long ones at that.  As adults we become busier, finding ourselves living lives that can hardly accommodate 15-minute naps. Besides, how many of us can really sleep within fifteen minutes?  Surely not me with my sleep issues.  Not only have I become busier as an adult, my insomniac tendencies have also heightened.  Sleep has gotten more elusive as the years go by and so I treat it now as a premium commodity.  

As I said, I'm always tempted to tell Noah of how my relationship with sleep has evolved.  But I don't want him to be scared or worried that he would turn out like me.  Who knows? Maybe he has more of his Dad's side of the family in terms of 'sleep genes', where some of them can sleep all day, or manage to sleep anywhere, anytime, regardless of position or location, effortlessly at that. (Oh, who am I kidding?...I'm his mother after all and given my love for structure and predictability, it's more likely he ends up like me.)

While I know he's at that age when kids naturally give up naps and possibly don't need them as much, I still wish he would realize sooner than later how wonderful naps are (or sleep in general); what good they do to our bodies; how tired adults would kill for them, and how in just a few more years, he would look back on these days and say, "Dang, I should have enjoyed them while I was still allowed to have them!"  Well, son, as they say, you never miss a good thing 'till it's gone.

Wednesday, July 3, 2013

How I Made My Son Hate Superman

After almost three weeks from its release date, my husband and I were finally able to watch Man of Steel.  We had to beg Noah to just go with us so we can see it, in spite of his protestations and firm resolve that his loyalties belong only to Iron Man.  (By the way, yes, I know the movie is PG-13 and we're awful parents for taking him.  Can we drop the judgment and move on now?)

Considering that the movie was more than two hours long, I was quite impressed that my son was able to behave the whole time and stay as patient as he could.  The restlessness was there of course, but there was no whining that went on.  Could it be because I kept my son entertained with the drooling that was taking place on my side of the theater?  Was it that obvious??

What probably started out as amusing to my son ended up as annoying.  The following day after seeing this movie, he must've noticed his mother endlessly Googling only two words:  Henry Cavill.  It would've been fine if I had stopped there but I uttered words that I didn't expect my son to deem unforgivable to the utmost degree:  "He's just the CUTEST!"

Apparently, I am not allowed to say those words about anyone else but him.  As soon as I said that, he growled, literally, and showed me the worst angry monster face he could muster.  He then said, "I hate Superman!", followed by, "Mama, I thought you said I'm the cutest for you???"

I felt bad.  A little bit.  But I couldn't lie.  This guy is gorgeous, and dare I say it, hot!  If you know me, you're probably a bit shocked considering that (1) I don't normally use the word 'hot' to describe men because I don't go for the conventional 'hot'; and (2) my dear Henry is actually 10 years younger than I am which is completely new territory for me.  Let me put it this way.  When my husband found out that I have a little crush going on, the first thing he said was, "But he's not OLD?!  You usually like older dudes (with graying hair, if they still have hair left)!"  (Yeah.  Thanks honey for bringing that up!).  

Let's be honest.  What's not to love about this ridiculously handsome face?  Not only does he have those dreamy eyes and dark hair, he's also an English man with awesome teeth!!  Whoa?!  

But please don't get me wrong.  I don't only love him for his face.


There's his body too!

I admit that I think it's actually cute that my son's a bit jealous.  I didn't realize he was that possessive of me and my approval.  (Duh!)  However, I know that I better tone this down now.  No it's not because I'm afraid of the  cougar label; nor is it out of concern for my son's self-esteem.  (If anything, I think it's great that he knows it's not my sole purpose to worship him).  I just think I need to behave myself now, stop pissing my son off and encourage some admiration for Superman IN CASE Man of Steel part two gets released anytime soon.  It's better to have him on my side next time rather than have him whine, roll his eyes, scream for Iron Man and ruin my concentration on this angstsy alien superhero....or is it Greek god???