Sunday, May 13, 2012

Mother's Day Insanity

I have decided to live up to the cliché and general expectation so here it is….my posting for this year’s Mother’s Day!

It is my sixth year as a mother and I would have to say that this holiday is becoming more and more interesting by the year, as Noah ages and learns how to express himself better.  But before I get to that, let me just give you some updates on how we spent the day. 

This year is even more special because I have my Mom here with us.  Not doing anything special to mark this day would have been tragic given that most years, I don’t get to spend this holiday with her.  

So, off we went to Mother’s Day Brunch at a Marriott Hotel nearby. Food was great, company was awesome (had my bff’s family with us) and by the end of the 2 hours of stuffing ourselves, my belt was once again begging to be unbuckled.  (See you again tomorrow, beloved treadmill!)

I only had my Ipod with me and I was too embarrassed to take photos of everything  so this is all I have...
I did share all this with my Mom...well, except for the chocolate cupcake...

So what did I receive from my baby this year?  With the help of his preschool teachers, each of the students in his class made cards for their Moms with a picture of mother and child.  


And the piéce de résistance was a vase that he painted himself and then clear glazed.  I LOVE IT!!  And it’s so adorable how my son is just so proud of it and told me that he picked the colors himself and that he really wanted the vase to be bright and cheery!  I was curious about how he chose the color for the lip of the vase.  He said his teacher asked him how he wanted to paint it and that he chose green because it's his favorite color.  It's mine too so...well done, son!  It's simply perfect!

Now, let's go back to the card.  The teacher wrote the text for them but the idea was for them to complete each sentence about their mothers.  I was struck by the consistency in my son's answers.  At the same time, it troubles me.  Here's what I mean:

My Mom is special because..."she cooks for me."
My Mom can do many things!  I think she's best at..."cooking spinach pastry."
My Mom is smart!  She even knows..."how to cook hard (difficult) things!"

Remember my blog post on a SAHM's secret identity?  Well, it appears I was spot on especially where it concerns my son's perception.  Apparently he thinks I'm all about cooking and serving him his meals.  Though I am touched by his appreciation of what I do for him, his statements have also made me wonder if in his eyes, that's all I am capable of doing.  I was expecting at least something like, "My Mom is smart, she knows how to type a lot of words on the computer for her blog site", or something to that effect.  At least that could have added more dimension to my being a homemaker.

And this brings me to an even deeper question.  How do I really want my son to see and define me?  More than just saying I'm a good mother, loving and caring and all those almost given qualities, which of my capabilities do I want my son to acknowledge?  And more importantly, WHY?  Why would that be so important?  Am I once again going back to my insecurities about the value I add to our lives by choosing to be a homemaker?  Is my desire to further prove my self resurfacing once again?  

I have a million questions in my head, endlessly multiplying.  Who would have thought Mother's Day could cause such psychosis!?!  Is there anyone out there willing to offer free therapy???