Tuesday, December 13, 2011

To Cut or Not to Cut...Is That Really Just the Question?

I didn’t think it would be this bad.  I mean, I knew I would have a hard time, but never in a million years did I imagine I would be this indecisive about something so trivial.

My hair.

Yes, most of us have proclaimed at some point that you never ever mess with one’s hair.  A person’s hairstyle could spell out confidence, success and ultimately, happiness.  Well, alright, maybe not happiness with a capital ‘H’ but just good mood which of course affects everything else, right?  My problem is that I can’t bring myself to go to a hair salon here in TN.  Before leaving Chicago, I made sure I paid my stylist a visit one last time.  I got a haircut and said to myself, “This should last at least 3 months and by then I’d have already either found a new reliable stylist or would have visited Chicago again to go back to my beloved Andy (stylist)”.  It has now been 4 months and I have not had the guts to step into a new hair salon and my hair is screaming for a cut so badly! 

Some people have given me recommendations.  I’ve also seen ads and have done some research.  I’m looking for a hip-looking place, one that at least appears to be modern enough so as not to give me a traditional or stereotypical Southern ‘older-lady’ Paula Deen hair, and I’m also not willing to drive too far so distance is a major consideration.  Do my criteria even make sense?  I don't really know but that's the truth.  

And maybe the problem is not really the ambivalence about the salons but as to whether I want a haircut or not?! For the past seven years, I've sported short hair and it has gotten shorter and shorter in the past two years.  I happen to LOVE short hair.  Yes I do have a roundish face and I am far from being skinny but I have stopped caring. I think it's stylish, suits my personality more and I feel more powerful with it. However, about two months ago, a conversation with my best friend made me wonder.

She pointed out that here in TN, most people our age have longer hair and that it's generally the 'seniors' who mostly sport hair as short as ours.  About the same time we had this discussion, there was an online article highlighting the fact that majority of men prefer long hair and that long hair, being equated with fertility, is what is deemed attractive.  Normally, I couldn't care less.  But I think something happened when I realized I was nearing 38 and that it's been almost eight years since I last noticed anyone stare at me or give me a double take.  I'd like to think that the timeline just happens to be consistent with me not caring anymore (given that I already had a significant other) but a part of me wonders and suspects it's not just that.  Sure there was at least one time recently when someone was introduced to me and though the handshake lasted longer than normal and I noticed he was staring quite intently to the point of causing me a bit of unease, I think it was not so much as attraction as him trying to figure out what I was....Is she Asian, Latina or what??  At least that's what I think.

So my point is, admittedly there is a part of me that desires to be desired.  And if it would mean having to experiment with longer hair, then I confess that I'm certainly tempted.  Part of me is curious and wants to find out if it would make a difference, while another part of me doesn't want to care and just wants to go on with my old short-haired self.  One thing has definitely become clear to me and that is the reality that I am getting old and now find myself confronting issues I never thought mattered when I was so much younger...skin, facial lines, and just generally aging gracefully.    

And since I'm still ambivalent, I have decided to go for a middle ground.  I would still go for a haircut (though unsure about which location) but go for something not too short that would hopefully transition nicely to a longer style should I decide to eventually grow it.   Below are two styles I found online.  Don't they look VERY similar to you?  How do you think are they different?  Votes are welcome by the way, so thanks in advance!

(This is me, taken around 3 weeks ago)....