Friday, June 4, 2010

Fortune Friday: 6.4.10



“You cannot put the same shoe on every foot.  Try amending your plan.”


I've been staring at this 'fortune' for hours and hours and couldn't figure out how to interpret this on a personal level.  At some point, I had given up and out of boredom just decided to go to my Facebook homepage and took a peek at what's going on with my friends' lives.  


Then just now, approximately 30 seconds ago, it hit me.  After perusing through some of the photos posted by some of my FB contacts and once again feeling pangs of jealousy over what others seem to have accomplished or how they're living their lives and what they've ended up with, I finally heard the 'fortune' truly speaking to me...."What works for them won't necessarily work for you.  Just because they have what they have doesn't mean they are better off than you are".  


I suppose at this point, it's not so much about me amending my plan but amending my desires.  I know the 'plan' has changed.  To be honest, at this point I'm not even certain if a plan still exists.  What I need to do is accept that I am where I need to be for whatever reason.  What I need to do is make the most of who I am now given where I am.  What I need to remember most of all is that my life now is how I chose it to be.  Choices have been made that place me where I am now and I am not merely a victim but an agent of those choices.  I had such grand plans before...live the life of an intellectual, travel to Europe, grow old with my closest friends and have our kids grow old together as well.  The only real reason why my life took the turns that it did is because I chose it so.  


I was the one that gave up what I had previously planned on.  


I was the one that chose some relations over others.


I was the one that changed my mind about what I thought was my calling in life.


It was all me and in the same way that I chose before, I continue to choose in the present, in each and every moment given to me.  If my life continues on its present path, it would mainly be because of my own desires and choices. Sometimes, somehow, the avenues open to us are limited.  But change can always be achieved if, and only if, we truly want it.  If we want it badly enough for us to actually initialize and catalyze it, something will happen. Something will change, either way.  And we just have to be equally responsible for the consequences at hand.        


When I become restless like this, wondering about the 'roads untravelled', I turn to the Serenity Prayer for ample perspective...


God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference...    

May this prayer bring peace as well to those of you who also wonder, question and even experience some degree of regret at times over certain things.  If we can truly be rational about the whole thing, we will realize that regrets and 'wonderingments' are but forms of self-flagellation.  Why be cruel to ourselves when there are so many other things to be grateful and happy about?  Let's adjust our lenses, refocus and be more gentle with our selves.  

I need to be more gentle with myself.       



    











11 comments:

  1. amen to that. i feel the same way at times but i always check myself by remembering the saying - 'the grass is always greener at the other side of the fence'. then i feel better. hahaha.

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  2. Chelsea Otero- LopezJune 4, 2010 at 10:22 PM

    I love what you wrote... each should choose what makes their own happiness. Thanks for this Joy :-)

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  3. OMG, you took the words right out of my head (and heart)! We are not victims of circumstance. We are proactive agents of the circumstance where we find ourselves.

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  4. Joy,
    well written and definitely came from the heart and for that I salute you ... as they say, everything happens for a reason and not by chance - and that included the decision we made and the path we will traverse ... chin up, you are one intelligent person living a life that might not be what you were expecting but others would die for....

    take care
    jigi

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  5. the master blogger did it again!! straight from my heart/mind/mouth to the pages of her bloggs..how the heck can you read my thoughts and be able to write down the words as precisely as how i wanted them to be...you are such a gifted writer...keep you blogs coming..im not jealous now..im trying to be gentle to myslef...lol

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  6. soooo true!! i choose..thats why i live!! a wrong decision will always be better than no decision at all! :P keep your bloggs coming...kakaaliw...

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  7. Peach Fondevilla MontesaJune 22, 2010 at 5:43 PM

    Joy, I like when you said: "I need to be more gentle with myself." :)

    The serenity prayer is my favorite, along with this passage, which I believe is from Mother Teresa:

    "May today there be peace within you.
    May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be.
    May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith.
    May you use the gifts that you have received and pass on the Love that has been given to you.
    May you be content knowing you are a child of God. Let this presence settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love."

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  8. soooo true!! i choose..thats why i live!! a wrong decision will always be better than no decision at all! :P keep your bloggs coming...kakaaliw...

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  9. Joy,
    well written and definitely came from the heart and for that I salute you ... as they say, everything happens for a reason and not by chance - and that included the decision we made and the path we will traverse ... chin up, you are one intelligent person living a life that might not be what you were expecting but others would die for....

    take care
    jigi

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  10. OMG, you took the words right out of my head (and heart)! We are not victims of circumstance. We are proactive agents of the circumstance where we find ourselves.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Chelsea Otero- LopezJune 23, 2011 at 12:13 PM

    I love what you wrote... each should choose what makes their own happiness. Thanks for this Joy :-)

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